my story

I just thought I would share a blog post I did for a friend. She recently had a baby and wanted to take some time off from her blog and asked a few of her friends to guest post. Here's the link: Enjoy!!

I don't want to make any promises....

I was reminiscing recently. I tend to do that a lot this time of year, but this time my memories came in the form of looking through old blog entries.

Why on earth have I not kept up with this!? Why didn't someone tell me that I would forget so much!? (ok, so you probably DID tell me, but why didn't you tell me to LISTEN?!) Now I'm at a point where I have nothing to show for Silas or Miriam and very little of Lydia. ugh! Those poor, poor kids. Now's the time though. I'm going to try to write regularly b/c *I* want to remember. I'm not sure I care if you are reading or not. I just want to remember the cute things they say and do. I want to document their lives. our lives.

I love my kids. I love the things they teach me. I love the things God teaches me through them.

10 years

Nothing reminds me of Andrew's death like 9/11. I guess it's b/c it reminds me of that year and I can relate to those who lost loved ones on that day even though my love didn't die until a month later. Needless to say, with all the news coverage, special services at church, and flags at half-staff I spent much of the day with tears in my eyes. I can't believe it's been 10 years.

What happened to hospitatlity?

When I was a child, I remember regularly sharing meals (especially Sunday dinner) with other families in our church or community. James remembers the same thing from his childhood. Does that even happen anymore? Am I just not seeing it?

While living in Northern Virginia we were invited to our friends' home regularly. Beth is a great cook and I always looked forward to whatever she put on the table. Sometimes it was a formal invite for dinner, but most of the time we were there before or after her son's football games. We invited them to our home one time to watch an NFL game (I'd like to say we invited them more often than that, but I don't remember). We simply ordered pizza, but Beth mentioned to me that in the years that they had been living in Virginia (probably 2 or 3), we were the first to invite her family into our home for a meal. She regularly serves tables full of people, but had not been invited to another's home? She attributed it to the size of her family. I wonder if the problem is deeper. I wonder if people are intimidated by the thought of hostessing. It IS intimidating to find a time that works for both families, plan a menu, do the shopping, clean the house, teach the kids to behave, pray for nice weather, cook the meal and serve it while EVERYTHING is hot, etc. Not to mention the gazillion or so websites that show beautiful tabelscapes and decor that we feel the need to live up to.

OR are we just too busy to be bothered?

When was that last time you were invited to another family's home for a meal?

When was the last time you did the inviting?

I know people who are good at it. It's their spiritual gift. It's a gift I want to find in myself. I've been reading books and collecting (and trying) recipes. I hope to make them for more people than just my family. If I invite you to dinner, PLEASE be patient with me. I'm a work in progress. I'm not the best cook, but I don't tend to burn everything. I might leave the chicken in the slow cooker a little too long. I might not have the children in their best dresses. You might have to step over toys and overlook some clutter, but I'd love to have you come enjoy our company and our fresh air.

So, who's coming to dinner?

reminiscing

Fall is a time of pondering and looking back, for me. It's a time to sit and remember times that once were but can never be again. It's my season to enjoy my hot chocolate on the porch with a good book and some self-reflection.

It may not be fall yet, but the temperatures have lured me to that place of remembering already. Many times. On my mind lately is that there are certain things I can't say. Luxuries given to other wives that I don't have the freedom to speak.
I wish I could've loved just one man for my entire life, but that is not the road God chose for me. And that is not the road I prefer either. Do I seem to be contradicting myself? Let me explain... I WISH I had that luxury of NOT knowing what it is like to love 2 men. I wish Andrew had never died. I wish I could've had his children and lived happily ever after in ignorance about the possibility that God had something different in His perfect plan. I prefer His plan, though. And I prefer the blessed life that He has given me; knowing that I have been loved WELL by two great men is a gift that I am happy to receive.

So, while I am not able to say that my husband is the only man I have ever loved, I will be able to tell my children that their daddy is the man that I love more than anything on earth both now and happily ever after. And some day I will tell them about the other man that I loved once upon a time in a land far, far away.

me and the measure of things

I'm trying to discover things I'm good at.




Blogging is not one of them.


Growing adorable children might be.

How quickly they grow...

He's getting big, huh? 8.5 months old.

Mommy: "It's a Miriam Sandwich".

Catie: "It's a Catie Taco."

Mommy: "A 'Catie taco'?"

Catie: "No, a Catie TACKLE!"